What is Somatic Psychotherapy?

Whenever I get contacted by a new person who is thinking about whether therapy is something they want to consider, I offer them a space to meet with me to discuss the possibility – a free 30minute consultation. I do this for many reasons but what lies close to a top priority is that having this chat can often be eye-opening and (in)formative for the person – supporting how they prepare for the process of therapy and learn what is somatic psychotherapy. Invariably we discuss their reasons for reaching out, how do they notice and experience these life challenges and what would be their present orientation or expectation of success. Often there is an initial exploration of HOW is this thing called therapy conducted? What does it look like in practice and what do they feel is their role in the journey we are planning for?

What is most surprising are the habitual preconceptions and expectations that people have set about the therapy process. The medical model of treatment, and more benignly, popular culture and TV have greatly influenced how people think about the space.

A place to talk our way to relief?

In my experience people invariably expect a lot of talking and sitting and figuring out, problem solving their way to an ultimate ‘aha’ solution which will clear the fog, loosen the nut and offer relief and freedom from their existential pain. Therein lies an unchallenged truism, a rigid belief I encounter; that therapy is intrinsically about a lot of hard thinking work – a lot of mental drudgery and graft in order to locate and reconfigure the core mistakes of their character; to banish the badness within and burrow down within themselves and mine some rich vein of goodness within themselves. I can be seen as the someone who will ask the right questions and help to pinpoint the faults and set them in the right direction. This model works well for broken arms but not for broken hearts. These first bites into verbalizing expectations can highlight strong misconceptions not only about therapy, but about their inherent value and value as individuals. It sheds some insight into how we, who are hurt, can feel about ourselves. It can be experienced as…

It is our fault and we are choosing to feel bad and take actions to sabotage our own lives -help me to make better decisions.

However, I feel that rather than us believing we are the instigators of this process – making a choice in where and what we do – I feel it is often what is compelling us, driving and capturing our attention that overwhelms us and demands a spotlight that becomes what we focus on – catastrophizing thoughts are a common example. The reality can often be that you come to therapy because these forces within you choose now to be a time to heal. It compels us to cooperate and be the priority in your life. We are the instigators of violence upon ourselves if we ignore or resist this wise pain. Therapy can be the process of being supported to learn to build the capacity to trust what we can’t understand or put in words clearly yet. To build enough space to follow the pain rather than fight it, turn our attention away from it or to run away from it.

Maybe within the dark cave of your existence is the light you have always been searching for?

Weird huh?

A Somatic Map?

If you are curious about this process of somatic therapy and want to reach out about the possibility of journeying together, please email me on jasoncowell.counsellor@gmail.com.

Okay, maybe a simple map might help. If we were to see that our life can be viewed as a river -an external reality that we see, can touch and that we engage with in the present moment – action and reaction in-continuum. Our life can be about sitting on the proverbial bank surveying the relative stillness and meandering flow of water as it passes by moment to moment, ripple by ripple. Each ripple, each stirring is engaged with through trying to exhort energy/effort into fixing the imbalance of work, health, our intimate relationships, children and the myriad of responsibilities. This can ultimately mean we can view our life as a series of tasks and actions that add to or minimize our stress. The unspoken mantra can become Keep the plates spinning, keep on top of things and strive for happiness and satisfaction. In this way we stay on the bank and are separate from the ripples, we are doing life, ‘go-getters’ and ‘achievers’. External striving over internal curiosity.

You hold the key to your own happiness

But, you see, we don’t see the world truly as it is – we see the world as we are. What if the problems we experience as outside of ourselves are largely a product of how we feel within ourselves? What if how we see the world is largely a by-product of our life experiences, both nourishing and damaging? When we didn’t have words or clear memories in which to create a clear story in which to frame and understand what happened, we store the imprint psychobiologically (in our psyche and in our bodies). The idea of inherited rose(darkly?)-tinted glasses say it most accurately. What if, like the river, there is whole inner landscape, a rich untapped ecology that underpins this reality in which we inhabit. This unexploited world has its own unspoken language and rules of engagement. It cries out to us in unspoken ways such as depression, anxiety, critical thoughts, body tension, lack of sleep or headaches, to name a few examples.

It is our unconscious.

A place where every single moment of our life and the life of our family and ancestry is amalgamated and forged into a unique lens – A way of seeing and experiencing the world. Somatic therapy becomes a means of us together, as a team, sitting on the bank of the river and beginning the journey to step into, wade within and eventually swim, occasionally surf and, when safety and opportunity meet, to dive deep into the river bed of your life. We do this by being curious about the reaction in each moment – how our unconscious shows up and steers you away from being able to meet each moment afresh.

In simple terms, like any new relationship, we stay curious moment to moment and listen to how it begins to tell us about how you have needed to be or adapt in order to survive until now – to live another day. For example, how that hunch in your back, rather than just being a natural curvature, is a physical representation of the need to stay small and out of sight as a child for fear of being criticized or blamed for things in your family – or how we feel the influence of anger and suspicion when in new social situations as a sign of a powerful template that expects to see that people can’t be trusted and are only out for themselves. Perhaps the result of an abusive relationship as a child, innocent lost to manipulation. The cost of doing business.

In this journey words and language come to support these feelings, sensations, movements, gestures, images, memories, tensions, reactions and responses that come into our awareness. They can be a way to add to our experience rather than take us out of it.

If you are curious about this process of somatic therapy and want to reach out about the possibility of journeying together, please email me on jasoncowell.counsellor@gmail.com.

I wish you peace and kindness in your coming day.